Posts Tagged ‘merchandise’

Barack-in-roll: Obama sushi

02/18/2009

Obama SushiThere’s something fishy in Washington, and no, it’s not the watered-down stimulus bill.  From the same island nation that brought you Super Mario, Power Rangers and animated pornography, I present to you Obama sushi!

The problem with Obama sushi, like the stimulus package, is that after half-an-hour, you already want more.

Unfortunately, I do not speak Japanese, but thanks to the wonders of the internets (which is, from what I understand, a series of tubes), I have obtained this translation:

“It is done. Please eat this.” As too nice to eat, and even extreme masterpiece “rolled sushi ornament” What a surprise! “But design is also important, as important as taste. After all is food. I’m finished I get to eat tasty”

Truer words have never been spoken.  Thanks to Jaime G, who has been killing it with the links.

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Editorial: Obama be effin’ up my shiznit

02/15/2009

HaterI thought we were voting for hope and change.  I didn’t realize that we were voting for a total dict-hater.

According to Gawker.com, the Department of Homeland Security has sent a cease-and-desist letter to Sixpoint Craft Ales, a Brooklyn based brewery, to stop production of Hop Obama beer.  DOHS goes so far as to threaten to seize the brewery if the hoppy brew featuring the President’s name is not discontinued.

Honestly, how can he talk about economic stimulus when he’s basically shutting down the fastest growing segment of our economy?  As this blog has documented, people will sell (and buy) anything with Obama’s name or likeness on it.

How will I be able to continue this blog if there’s no more Obama dildos, no more Obama plungers, no more quarters with the word “Obama” written with a sharpie?

Seriously Obama, would you like some Hateraide with those hater-tots?  Who are you, Ruth Hater Ginsburg all of a sudden?  Do you shop at Hater Joe’s?  If Dubbya was the decider-in-chief, Obama is surely the hater-in-chief.

So Obama.  Do us a favor.  Times are rough enough.  Let us keep our Obama condoms, Obama pornos, and Obama soap-on-a-rope.  You stick to the economy, the wars in Iraq and Afghanistan, your next Commerce Secretary and what type of dog to get Sasha and Malia, mmmmk?